Here at "Fratton Faithful" we've been advised that perhaps it's time to move with the times. Kids these days - fat, aren't they? Too many sweeties and too much sugar. So in order to join the side of such righteous brothers as Jamie Oliver this report should not only inform you about football, but also educate about healthy eating. Tuck in!
Date; 5th August 2005.
First things first with this match, and I think it's fair to say that you really can't read too much into it. A typical dull end-of-season affair with not much on the line and from time to time played at nothing more than testimonial pace. We should really just be grapefruit that we could find any opposition at all after Iran's late decision to pull out, and lettuce be pleased that we managed to get a win without ever trying all that hard.
The starting lime-up was always going to be interesting and once again De Zeeuw failed to make the grade which will lead to some predicting his exit. Gregory Vignal started at left back in place of Matt Taylor and Alain Perrin seems to be using a "carrot and stick" approach for these two as they fight it out for the right to start next week against Tottenham Hot-spuds.
The match got under way and perhaps the most striking thing was the horrific green and yellow kit donned by the visitors. Still coming from Holland what do you expect - this is a country whose national side wear a charming orange outfit. Pompey could've expected to get off to a flier as their visitors had had a tricky trip over, including an unexpected changeover in Brussels (possibly). But first half chances were at the premium; the first and most obvious came we won a free kick on the edge of the area. Although Stefanovic and LuaLua were queue-cumbering up for a go it was left for Robert to unleash a banana shot which the keeper had to deal with.
LuaLua would've been kicking himself with a clear chance to put us ahead after a poor backpass set him through with just the keeper to beet. Luckily for the hapless defender one of his mates got back to tackle and saved him from looking like a right lemon. The rest of the first half passed with little event although the opposition were living up to the title of "the Millwall of Holland" and tackles started to fly in at knee height all over the pitch. Andy Griffin was lucky to escape with a yellow card after a truly horrific studs-up challenge on a visiting man - go to a television right now if you can and see a replay; I have no doubt in a league match he would've been looking at a sending off.
At half time however the scores remained tied and the players trundled off to the dressing room to take on board the sage advice of the management.
Pompey were forced into a change in the second half after Karadas was worryingly stretched off with an injury. Initial reports suggest a six week absence which puts even more pressure on Collins Mbesuma, who watched from the directors box. Pericard replaced him and quickly he joined LuaLua in the pursuit of being caught plum offside. On the couple of occasions Pompey were able to spring-onion the offside trap little resulted; either Robert or O'Neil could not provide the accurate cress needed, no-one was up in support or the keeper dealt with matters easily, plucking the ball like figs from a tree.
By now we were being restricted mostly to chances from set pieces although sadly short corn-ers were still the order of the day. WHEN WILL PEOPLE LEARN THEY DON'T WORK! A couple of free kicks in promising positions from outside the box seemed like certain Robert shooting opportunities, although on one occasion in a real turnip for the books he let LuaLua have a go. Sadly the ball failed to trouble the keeper and sailed out of play.
In the end however it was ourselves who broke the deadlock, Robert's goal the cherry on top of a fairly dull evening. An attack that sprouted in the middle of the park saw the ball played across to the Frenchman who easily slammed the ball into the back of the onion bag. It was hardly a grape, er, great shot - more power than precision - but it did enough to give us the lead.
This forced the visitors into a reaction and they roused a rare challenge on goal when their number three hit a peach of a shot. Westerveld would have bean able to save easily until O'Brien decided to make things more interesting by putting a nice little deflection on it, although the Dutch stopper still kept the effort out. To be fair to the Irish international this was more bad luck than anything; along with Stefanovic he had formed a solid defence pear and never looked like conceding. Even when the allegedly departing De Zeeuw came on as a late sub it seemed most unlikely that there would be any leeks.
The night took a slight turn for the worse when Andy Griffin pulled up injured although he was able to walk off so hopefully he'll be ok. It seemed to be his calf that was the area and he's had problems there before but with only Aliou Cissé as cover we could be in trouble if it turns out to be serious. Gary Silk, an aggressive right back with strawberry blonde hair, came on in his place.
And that was pretty much that; full thyme Pompey 1 Den Haag 0. Alain would've been hoping for a bit more peas and quiet this evening and has ended up with a couple of injuries on his hands, but at least it's one step closer to fitness. Still some question marks over whether or not the squad is really up to the challenge of a Premier League season and reports still link us with the Swede, Kim Kallstrom. A right winger would be nice too though.
And finally, Perrin looked smart in his unbuttoned shirt/no tie combo with a grey jacket... potato.