Curse Of Players Past

Last updated : 30 August 2005 By Keith Allman

A quick note - if you're wondering why there's no report on our new signing, about how he's been likened to Zidane and Maradona, about how he once scored a bundle from midfield and about how he'll be a Zajec signing if he's rubbish and a Perrin signing if he's any good - well, you've come to the wrong site. You should know such mundane matters aren't worth discussing on here.

There's a far more pressing matter on my mind. After watching Ricardo Fuller score for Southampton tonight and reading what Newcastle and Boro fans have had to say about some of their latest purchases, it got me thinking about those who have once plied their trade at Portsmouth. More importantly, it sent me off wondering why it is that seemingly once you depart down the Eastern Road for the last time you are destined for a life time of failure.

Arguably, it could be because we don't sign the best players in the first place so once we're finished with them it's inevitable you're going to take a trip into the lower leagues and obscurity. But just say, for the sake of this article not having to end right now, that you were interested in wondering to which players I could be referring. Join me, won't you, for a brief look at some of the most hilarious falls from grace in recent times.

Scott Hiley
Player of the year and captain in 2001, Exeter City regular in 2003.

Nigel Quashie
Vice-captain and a possible contender for player of the year when he left, he has since enjoyed a successful relegation, a good old tonking in the derby and now looking forward to Hull away in a couple of months.

Deon Burton
Played a bit-part role in getting us promoted and now has the joy and pleasure of playing for Rotherham.

Amdy Faye
Wanted to play European football, so chose Newcastle (I know what you're thinking. That makes as much sense as moving to Everton for a Champions League campaign). Recently topped a poll for "Worst Signing Ever" and this comes from a club who have signed Bramble, Domi and Gavilan.

Paul Merson
Got us promoted as a hero before joining Walsall. After a wonderful spell as player-manager in which they got relegated and lost to Slough in the FA Cup, he's now looking after their attempts to get promoted back to The Championship.

Jason Crowe
From Championship medal to Grimsby in League Two. Now still in the same league, but playing for Northampton.

Carl Tiler
Never found another club, bless him.

Lee Mills
Despite a Petterson-esque loan spell at Coventry where he impressed enough to earn a full time contract, he soon found time to pop down to Telford. Who then went bust.

And to think, these are only a few choice selections! Others I'm with-holding opinion on (in particular Yakubu; he's taken a lot of stick for being lazy at Boro, would you believe, but it's still early days) whilst there are a couple of success stories such as Carl Robinson, who got himself promoted with Sunderland, and Peter Crouch who is now at Liverpool.

But it's a vicious warning to the players of today - leave us at your peril...